Take a Beat w/ a Badass 71-Year Old Trailblazer Still Trailblazing

On 6/26/24 we are celebrating my first ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ movie of 2024, my favorite movie of 2023, and those moments when the club (loosely defined) plays YOUR song.

Jun 26, 2024

You may have noticed in my newsletters so far that there isn’t really any “criticism”. That’s because Take a Beat is more about celebrating the things I love, however… I recently heard some Haterade that I did in fact LOVE...

On one of my favorite podcasts, How Long Gone, Chris and Jason referred to the particular kind of ever-multiplying overpriced, aesthetic-driven, millennial-core store, awash in gentle colors and rounded edges and tinned fish, as “shoppy-shops”. Now try calling something a “shoppy-shop” without sounding condescending or derogatory… you CAN’T! Which is why it is a perfectly executed nickname. Sometimes the haters deserve kudos, particularly when you can get behind the cause…

IN OTHER NON-HATERADE NEWS —

I went to the park to be washed in 71 year-old rock genius Kim Gordon’s genre-bending sludgy trappy hyper-rock, and I left INSPIRED.
Heard Death Grips in the wild, wrote an essay
Why is everyone talking about that other Glen Powell romcom with Miss Titties and not about the MASTERPIECE Hit Man on Netflix right now?!
All of Us Strangers, my favorite movie of 2023, provided the most beautiful and revelatory emotional battering I’ve ever experienced watching a movie.
Take a BRAT: Charli XCX is not letting me rest, featuring Lorde

Man About Town

Kim Gordon @ Central Park SummerStage

If I told you I was going to see a septuagenarian indie rock legend play at Central Park for free, I expect you would picture a stop on a reunion tour where fellow septuagenarian fans gather to wax nostalgic about the 80s. In fact, you would be closer to correct if you guessed by way of musical genre MadLibs — picture this instead:

A sexy, chic septuagenarian in a glimmery short skirt playing brand new industrial, glammy trap rock closer to hyperpop than to rock and roll for an array of indie music nerds largely in their 20s or 30s.

Kim Gordon was the bassist and singer for the iconic indie rock group Sonic Youth, active starting in the early 80s and until 2011. But upon disbanding, Kim seemingly hungered for more than a cushy retirement or even a conventional pivot to book writing or indie-legend status. Rather, she decided to push the form yet further than she had already pushed it for 30 years.

For her first two albums as a solo artist, released at ages of 66 and 70, Kim Gordon collaborated with cutting-edge producer prodigy Justin Raisen, who is best know for his experimental work with the likes of Lil Yachty, Charli XCX, Yves Tumor, and Grace Ives.

My two favorite songs from this magical unorthodox collaboration are “Bye Bye” and “Murdered Out”. On “Bye Bye”, Gordon deploys a deep, matter-of-fact sing-speak to recite a packing list over deep, trappy bass, alarm bell synths, and abrupt drum machine loops. As the song hardens, so do you — into a menacing gangster ready to stampede down the jet bridge with your thoroughly packed suitcase.

“Milk thistle, calcium, high-rise, boot cut, Advil, black Jeans /
Blue jeans, cardigan, purse, passport, pajamas, silk.” - Kim Gordon

On “Murdered Out”, Gordon deploys a sage, smoky, lusty singing voice to command someone to “TURN [HER] ONNNNNNNN” over what sounds like a pile of electric guitars doused in acid, writhing in pain; it’s staticky, crunchy, knotty, and aggressively hypnotic, and as proven by my friend who said he got “a little hard” listening to her order him around, you’ll gladly turn yourself over to Kim’s discomfiting spell.

a group of people thankful to be yelled at by an old sexy lady

Kim Gordon is also a certified Spotify algorithm breaker. While Spotify has the awful habit of serving you the same shit you already love over and over, when I made a radio out of one of Kim’s songs, Spotify served me up a brand new batch of post-rock and punk, oldies and newbies — it soundtracked a full week of musical listening experimentation.

So the next time I fear I’m being put into, say, a too design-heavy role!!!!, or that my boss just isn’t hearing me!!!, I’m going to remember that Kim Gordon broke my fucking algorithm with her sickening, genre-bending genius at 2.5x my age.

Sing-cronicity, or

When the Establishment Plays Your Song

Just a quick shoutout to those special times when the establishment you’re spending time in unexpectedly hits you with your mf’ing JAM with no advanced notice. This s/o was first inspired by the brazen DJ at East River Bar in south Williamsburg who recently played “The Fever (Aye Aye)” by Death Grips for a grand total of 7 patrons, 2 of whom (or a solid 28.6%) were delighted, and one of whose (50% of the 2) birthday we were celebrating — a broken clock blah blah blah — so thank you to that reckless, self-indulgent DJ for abrading the ears of the other 71.4% of patrons’ ears for two self-satisfied dweebs :) (s/o Sam).

need a t-shirt with this on it for pride not joking

The weekend prior at local Hell’s Kitchen default gay bar Rise they played Cardi B’s 2019 Grammy’s performance followed by Lady Gaga’s Sound of Music tribute at the 2015 Oscars, each accompanied by their live performances on video. This gave me the very special opportunity to say “WOW is that Cardi B’s 2019 Grammys performance where she’s in archival Mugler?!” to a group of men who were not nearly as smitten with me and my trivia as they should have been.

As has been noted in this here newsletter, I was absolutely BLESSED to move to NYC the same year as the release of a new Vampire Weekend album. A Vampire Weekend release is like a solar eclipse: it only happens once every 5 or so years, but in every case the totality zone is squarely Vampire Weekend’s beloved New York City. On the release day of their fifth LP, I went to get my morning cup at Birch Coffee, with whom I’m lucky enough to share a building, only to find they were STREAMING Only God Was Above Us by Vampire Weekend IN FULL ALREADY. Home is where THAT is.

You know how people post those dumb “{insert city here} ain’t ready for us!” captions when they vacation in a city that is definitely ready for them? Well, when I visited Chicago last year, it would seem that (Ex-)Mayor Lori Lightfoot had gotten the memo, because I was eating amazing dan dan noodles at a Chinese restaurant that was playing THE ENTIRETY OF Hole’s 1998 album Celebrity Skin, and while Courtney Love is (generously) considered an acquired taste, I acquired that taste a long time ago and she went GREAT with those noodles. That same weekend I was dancing at what was my favorite gay bar in the country, Berlin (RIP), when they played “Immaterial” by SOPHIE, who, like Berlin but exponentially more tragically, also left us too soon. I got to jam out to an iconic and underappreciated song by a fallen hero at a now-defunct iconic establishment — it felt like iconic behavior then and sure reads as iconic behavior to this day, if I do say so myself…

The special song/Josh/random establishment trio provides a special kismet that makes me feel that I’m at the exact place I should be in that moment (even if the establishment is City MD where I’m awaiting STD testing and the song is Kelela’s “On the Run” (not kidding)). So I sincerely hope that soon you hear your fav freaky shit while you’re getting a haircut or you’re at the vet or you’re trying on a cute tank top or you’re eating breakfast or you name it. Because in that moment, that’s where you’re meant to be.

Has this happened to you recently? If so, comment with any providential examples to warm my heart on your behalf :).

Future Romcom Hall of Fame Nominee?

Hit Man @ The Paris Theater (and on Netflix)

Hit Man hit Netflix May 24th, and I already think it has Romcom Hall of Fame potential… to make my case, let's review the Romcom Rules That I Am Making Up Right Now (TM) to see if this can be nominated and potentially inducted down the line:

Does it have an absurd premise?
The leading man accidentally falls into a line of work where he poses as hit men to charge murderous individuals with intent to kill, so YES.

Does it have an absurd meet cute?
Our leading lady meets our leading man by requesting that he kill her POS husband, so YES.

Does the relationship progress via a series of absurd character foibles?
The fake hit man has to secretly maintain a relationship with his ex-almost-murder-conspirator client, and do they coincidentally run into the exact people they are looking to avoid? Of COURSE.
So, YES.

Okay, so we've gotten the basic absurdities out of the way. So far so good. But now for the REALLY challenging part for romcoms... does it all work?

Does the chemistry between our leads paired with fun writing and indelible encounters allow you to easily overlook all of the absurd plotholes?
By nature of the plot, Glen Powell has to be by turns dashing, pathetic, sexy, dweeby, Russian, incel — all while delivering consistent jokes and situational comedy. It's a tough task! Is Glen up for it?! Let’s just say my campaign for a Glen Powell Oscar nomination for Hit Man starts NOW. Meanwhile, Adria Arjona delivers a masterful mix of melodrama/comedy/mystery, probably the most perfectly in tune with what the (I’ll say it again!) absurd story requires.
So, also YES YES YES.

Do we get an extra som'n som'n beyond the fun romcom premise?
Freudian psychology, cases made for and against murder of other humans, and this topic from Bridesmaids are sprinkled in for some fun pondering along the way.

In the middle of some of the best scenes (of the movie and of the year) I was whimsically giggling and gesticulating with joy in the theater, adding up to my first ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ movie of 2024 so far!!!! A momentous occasion worthy of celebration and also this meme:

Speaking of ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ movies…

Take an Archival Beat

All of Us Strangers Movie Review

This review of my favorite movie of 2023 is pulled from my Letterboxd account. It essentially doubled as a journal entry that I vomited onto my computer after absolutely sobbing through the final 45 minutes of this movie earlier this year. THE POWER OF CINEMA.

Brokenness is like a fingerprint, unique to each and every person; each of us is shattered *just so* by the world around us colliding with our unique traits and experiences. We are shattered, and if we are fortunate enough to have the means, we do the best to put the pieces back together- of course, only to be shattered anew by some new experience or unpredictable winds of change. I am old enough and wise enough to know this, and sometimes even to appreciate it.

After watching All of Us Strangers, I can appreciate it anew. The universality of our brokenness. The value in recognizing that while we all are unique, there are whole swaths of people who experience a shared brokenness due to their shared traits, shared battles with society, their goddamn bad luck at being born during times when their traits mattered in ways out of their control.

All of Us Strangers centers one person's brokenness and the major life experiences that led to it. Adam grew up in a time when being gay was, at the very least, misunderstood, and, at the very worst, demonized. He experienced uniquely devastating tragedies. He missed out on opportunities for growth and relationships afforded to others. Despite this specificity, walking out of All of Us Strangers I was weeping not on behalf of Adam, but on behalf of EVERYONE. On behalf of those that are broken due to things completely out of their control, who have to battle constantly just to get a gulp of air.

All of Us Strangers was patient. It drew me in slowly, sneakily, until all of a sudden I was naked, vulnerable to its story, its messages, its tragedy and its beauty. It shot empathy and wisdom into my veins, and for that I am grateful and (at least briefly) changed.

Take a BRAT

Charli XCX Presents: The Brat Collection

Check out this fever dream sentence that is TRUE AND REAL LIFE:

Charli XCX is a huge cinephile, so she curated a film series comprised of movies that inspired Brat at the Roxy Cinema in Tribeca, and each film is preceded by the “360” music video, the “360” remix with Robyn and Yung Lean, and random footage of Charli being a badass. I moved to New York for stupid bullshit exactly like this.